ALLIE AYERS

I've learned that confidence comes from choosing to love yourself in the moments you really don't feel like it. There are plenty of days when my hair isn't working, or my thighs look weirdly big, or my concealer can't be put on thick enough… and I just have to choose to love those parts. Once I started doing that, the way I viewed my body completely changed.

It was a hard process getting to this place where I am honestly happy with the girl in the mirror. I started modeling as a "straight size" model, but because I was an athlete, that meant my hips were, by industry standards, too big despite my being super lean. I knew I wanted to model in bigger markets than Oklahoma, and at the time I didn't feel like I had the ability to say "No" to losing weight, so I started desperately trying to get that coveted thirty five inch hip. In the couple years following, my relationship with my body fell apart. I couldn't lose enough weight to love myself, and that turned into something really ugly. Thankfully, I eventually stepped out of modeling for a while and regained some perspective on what I really value about myself - turns out it's not physical. Once I was back in a good place, I took another swing at modeling - this time as a "plus size" model (at a size 8. Ha!).

 

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I'm always, always most comfortable in less - bra and panties, a swimsuit. My energy is noticeably different on set when I'm shooting in that stuff. I think that's because I worked so long to love what I'm working with, and now I'm excited to show other girls that aren't a 2-4 that we are sexy and just as qualified to work the hell out of lingerie as a smaller model. As far as memorable outfits go, walking in Sports Illustrated's first fashion show was pretty epic. The first time I ever wore a piece from Bissy Swim (my own swimwear line) was a cool moment too.

I feel so lucky to have found my team for Bissy. They get my vision, fully believe it is going to be as big as I'm dreaming it will be, and are willing to put in the work to get there. Those are the people you want behind you on any project.

 

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I like the privacy of an indoor shoot, but the setting of an outdoor shoot is usually more fun. I remember my first job in New York was a swimwear shoot, in April, in the middle of Chelsea. As you would expect, people pulled out their phones and gathered around. (laughing) You just learn to ignore them.

 

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One of the most challenging aspects of my work but one that I am truly grateful for is: All of the travelling. I'm constantly on the move, and that sacrifices any kind of routine. It's sometimes hard to feel like I never get to be home, but I'm so thankful for the places I get to see and the people I meet through that.

 

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More [optimistic] now than ever! I'm crazy busy right now, but that's because I'm working on a lot. I recently moved to LA, I'm starting this swimwear line, my first appearance in Sports Illustrated comes out February 14th, and I just got a cat. I'm pretty excited about life these days.

 

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The end of civilization will be caused by: Robots, obviously.

 
















01 // Natalie W. // natalie_wentworth
02 // Natalie W. // natalie_wentworth
03 // Erik Trent // erik.trent
04 // Natalie W. // natalie_wentworth
05 // Natalie W. // natalie_wentworth
06 // Brett David // brett.david
07 // Brett David // brett.david
08 // Chris O. // chrisossenfortphoto
09 // Brett David // brett.david
10 // Natalie W. // natalie_wentworth
11 // Don Nixon // don.ixon
12 // Natalie W. // natalie_wentworth
13 // Chris O. // chrisossenfortphoto
14 // Erik Trent // erik.trent
15 // Natalie W. // natalie_wentworth
16 // Cole Franklin

 

Allie Ayers // allieeayers

 

JUNNNKTANK is an online zine which has existed in one form or another since 2006.
For over a decade, the focus has been on highlighting the efforts of inspiring individuals and artists from around the world.

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Submissions are always welcome to junk@junnnktank.com.